Overcoming Emotions That Destroy: How to Be Good and Mad (the conclusion)

Today I will share tidbits from the conclusion to this wonderful resource, Overcoming Emotions that Destroy, by Pastor Chip Ingram and Dr. Becca Johnson.
Part 7: How to Be Good and Mad

Anger should be a stepping stone, not a stumbling block.

Anger is one of the most positive, effective weapons in the arsenal of God to bring about radical, righteous change.

Be Angry!

On many occasions, anger is good and produces good results.  History is full of far-reaching examples, such as William Wilberforce, whose anger over the injustice of slavery prompted the unraveling of England's laws that allowed it, and Martin Luther, whose anger over gross distortions of the gospel eventually catalyzed an entire reformation.

Is there an issue or injustice or situation that really makes you angry?  Could God be speaking to you about turning that anger into action?

Jesus's Example of Expressing Anger Appropriately
Mark 3:2-5, 11:15-17
Matthew 23:23-33

Jesus's Response When Attacked Unfairly
He remained quiet,
He gave it to God the Father.
He found no need to justify himself.
He didn't get defensive or insecure, start gossiping, become passive aggressive or erupt in explosive outbursts.

Expressing Our Anger Appropriately
Communicate your needs and concerns clearly
Use "I statements" rather than hurling accusations
Redirect excess anger in healthy ways
Extend grace, mercy love and forgiveness
Get angry at what really matters

What Healthy, Appropriate Anger Looks Like
1. Quick to hear
2. Slow to Speak
3. Slow to Anger
4. Expresses Anger
5. Expresses Anger Appropriately
6. Resolves Anger

1 Peter 2:19-21, 23

Our hurts may be superficial or they may be deep.  They may be over a fleeting events or an inescapable ongoing situation.  They may be coldly impersonal or painfully personal.  They may involve a stranger or a loved on.  Whatever the depth, the causes, or the consequences, we need to get rid of the anger by resolving it as quickly as possible.

Identify What Keeps Us From Resolving Our Anger
1. Desire for payback or revenge
2. Extreme apprehension and fear of confrontation
3. Apathy
4. Belief that the best course of action is no action

Titus 3:9

Your temper is one of your most valuable possessions don't lose it.

How Do You Know If It's Unresolved?

If hearing a name or recalling an event causes you to feel flushes, your blood pressure to ruse, knots or tighten in your stomach and your heart to race, your probably nursing and old wound.

List any areas of unresolved anger you are aware of in your life.  Pray over each person, place, or thing involved.  Ask God what practical steps you should take toward resolving each of these anger wounds.

Resolving Deep Anger

It's hard to let go of anger - especially when its roots are deep and bitterness is in full bloom.

No matter what the reason for your anger, being angry never makes things better.  If left unresolved, your anger can turn into a second problem.  Then you not only have to deal with the wrong someone did to you, but the wrong you've done to yourself.

How to Heal a Deep Wound

1. Cleanse the wound of dirt and debris (Eph. 4:31)

2. Treat the wound with healing ointment (Eph. 4:32)

3. Bandage the wound for protection (Eph. 5:1-2)

We can't change what was done/said to us, but we can change our responses.

Ps. 82:3-4

Wow! I have learned so much from reading Overcoming Emotions that Destroy by Chip Ingram and Dr. Becca Johnson. I hope that the notes I have shared have encouraged you to seek a copy of this book so that you too can begin to overcome emotions that negatively impact yourself and your relationships.