7 More

Are you ready for some more wonderful devotionals?

A Prayer for the Brokenhearted

Are You Comfortable Wearing Forgiveness?

Keep the Romance Alive: The Love Basket

My Mess is the Perfect Place for His Glory

Our Hiding Place

What Are Your Tools?

When Fear is Removed

Christianity

‘These people honor me with their lips,
but their hearts are far from me.
^{Matthew 15:8 NIV}

For years I have been speaking to different people about a topic that a pastor recently labeled for me - social Christianity - attending church on Sunday morning to find companionship with other people, not a relationship with the Lord. I have been disheartened by the leadership of several churches we've attended that appear to push growth by numbers, rather than spiritual growth.  By all accounts, these churches may very well have started off on the right path, but somewhere along the way have been waylayed.  Most likely there are still invidividuals attending these churches that having a growing relationship with the Lord and are saddened by what is going on in their congregation, but are unsure of how to solve the problem.

Having this new term - social Christianity - in mind, I did a search to see what is out of the web about this topic.  I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions on this article I found ...

Spiritual Christianity vs. Social Christianity

Think About Such Things...

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.

~ Phillipians 4:8 (NIV)

I hope that this mismatch of articles and devotionals will encourage and life you up...

A Mindset of Greatness

Communication: Breakdown

Plead The Promises

The Blessing of My Husband

The Purpose of Loneliness

Surviving a Spiritual Funk

When You Need to Feel the Pain

Mismatch

Organized - sometimes I think I am, sometimes not.  This week I noticed how many wonderful devotionals and articles I've saved on my favorites that I thought were beneficial in one way or another.  As you know, I like to share/store these writings here.  Today you'll find a mismatch.  Hopefully one of these will meet you right where you're at.

Fact: Christian Women Will Hurt You from (in)courage

15 Things You Should Give Up

It's Not Supposed to Be This Way from Proverbs 31 Ministries

Love the Lord With All Your Heart, Soul & Mind

When Friendship is Tough by Proverbs 31 Ministries

Why You Need to Find Community by (in)courage

Childless Mother's Day

This Thought Provoking Thursday I thought I'd share an Mother's Day article a friend posted on Facebook.  Mother's Day is a difficult time for those of us who are infertile.  For me, Mother's Day seems to get a little bit easier each year - probably due to the contentment mentioned in this article.  I am thrilled to death that this year I am going to be able to celebrate this holiday with my Mama Bear! 

That said, here are some nuggets of wisdom from one such woman ... A Letter to Infertile Women on Mother's Day.

Since our 12th Anniversary is on Sunday, I thought I'd share a few devotions about marriage for this week's Thought Provoking Thursday ...

Hope for Marriages

Remembering the Gift of Marriage

Keeping Your Marriage Strong

Devotions

With the new semester well underway and my caseload being very high, I haven't taken the time to share some wonderful devotionals that I've read online recently.  So, without further ado, here are my ten devos from the last few months...

Even in the Darkness by Wendy Blight

Growing Closer with God by Heather Bleier

Help for Recoverying Beth Mooreaholics from Marinate Blog

How's Your Reach? from (in)courage

I'm Beyond Hurt by Melissa Taylor

Physically Overweight and Spiritually Underweight by Lisa TerKeurst

Redefining Friendship from Perceptions & Passions

The Surrendered Wife...Really? by Carey Scott

What You’re Trying to Tell Him When You’re Angry ….. {5 Ways to Fight Through to a Loving Marriage} from (in)courage

When You Need Friends {But Have a Hard Time Finding Them} from (in)courage

Have you read something recently that has drawn you closer to God, made you pause to worship or caused you to glorify Him?

Are You That Sort of Bear?

I am a Pooh fan, so when I saw the following post about him, I wanted to see what the author had to say.  Winnie-the-Pooh and the Pervasiveness of Egocentric Bias: Why We ARE ALL That Sort of Bear, found on a blog of the Scientific American is a little wordy, but very interesting to ponder on a Thought Provoking Thursday.

I'd love to hear your thoughts,

Which Voice Will You Listen To?

Last week I shared that I've started following Carey Scott's blog Let's Get Real. As I have continued through the archives I've enjoyed the nuggets of wisdom she's shared from her walk with the Lord.  Since it is Thought Provoking Thursday, I thought I'd share Carey's post The Three Voices, which challenges us to consider - which voice of the many clamoring to be heard will we listen to?

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.”

Isaiah 30:21

I know that when I get into a sticky situation that the first voice I look to hear isn't always God's.  What about you?  When trouble comes your way, who's voice do you listen to - the world, other Christians or God?

What Kind of Light Are You?

A few weeks ago I was introduced to Carey Scott via a college friend on Facebook.  Among other "jobs" Carey writes for several blogs, including her own, Carey Scott Talks.  I took the time one evening to go back through some of her posts and when I came to this one - You Are a Light...But What Kind? - I thought it was a perfect topic for Thought Provoking Thursday.

What kind of light are you, at least at the moment ...
a Motion Detector Light?
a Night Light?
a Florescent Light?
a Spot Light?
or a Seasonal Light?

By no means do I believe this list is exhaustive, but reading this post did remind me, yet again of my tendency to fall into the spot light catergory. 

What's Your Apology Language?

Today's Thought Provoking Thursday is focused on the topic of apology.  Have you ever had someone apologize to you for something they said or did and you just didn't feel like the apology was genuine?  This may be because the two of you do not speak the same language of apology.  Want to find out what type of apology means most to you?  Check out Gary Chapman's site HERE.

Here's what author Gary Chapman and counselor Jennifer Thomas say in their book The Five Languages of Apology...

We are experts at wronging each other, but when it comes to setting things right, we all could use some help... In an eye-opening study of one of the most important yet least understood pillars of human relationships: the apology. Surprisingly, saying “I’m sorry,” isn’t primarily a matter of will—it’s a matter of how.

Expressing Regret

“Expressing Regret” is the Apology Language that zeroes in on emotional hurt. It is an admission of guilt and shame for causing pain to another person. For those who listen for “Expressing Regret” apologies, a simple “I’m sorry” is all they look for. There is no need for explanation or “pay back” provided the apology has truly come from the heart. “Expressing Regret” is a powerful Apology Language because it gets right to the point. It doesn’t make excuses or attempt to deflect blame. Above all, “Expressing Regret” takes ownership of the wrong. For that reason, “Expressing Regret” is understood as a sincere commitment to repair and rebuild the relationship. The “Expressing Regret” Apology Language speaks most clearly when the person offering the apology reflects sincerity not only verbally, but also through body language. Unflinching eye contact and a gentle, but firm touch are two ways that body language can underscore sincerity.

Accept Responsibility

It is very difficult for some people to admit that they’re wrong. It makes them doubt their self-worth, and no one likes to be portrayed as a failure. However, as adults, we must all admit that we are sinners and that we will make mistakes. We are going to make poor decisions that hurt our mates, and we are going to have to admit that we were wrong. We have to accept responsibility for our own failures. For many individuals, all they want is to hear the words, “I am wrong.” If the apology neglects accepting responsibility for their actions, many partners will not feel as though the apology was meaningful and sincere. Many partners need to learn how to overcome their ego, the desire to not be viewed as a failure, and simply admit that their actions were wrong. For a mate who speaks this apology language, if an apology does not admit fault, it is not worth hearing. Being sincere in your apology means allowing yourself to be weak, and admitting that you make mistakes. Though this may be hard to do for some people, it makes a world of a difference to your partner who speaks this language.

Make Restitution

In our society, many people believe that wrong acts demand justice. The one who commits the crime should pay for their wrongdoing. A mate who speaks this love language feels the same way towards apologies. They believe that in order to be sincere, the person who is apologizing should justify their actions. The mate who’s been hurt simply wants to hear that their mate still loves them.

There are many effective ways to demonstrate sincerity in an apology. Each mate must learn the other’s love language in order to complete the act of restitution. Though some mates may feel a though all is forgotten with a bouquet of flowers, that may not necessarily work for all mates. Every mate should uncover what their partner’s main love language is (Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, and Receiving Gifts) and use that specific language in order to make restitutions in the most effective way.

For a mate whose primary apology language is making restitutions, no matter how often you say “I’m sorry”, or “I was wrong”, your mate will never find the apology sincere. You must show strong efforts for making amends. A genuine apology will be accompanied by the assurance that you still love your mate 
and have a desire to right the wrong-doings committed.

Genuinely Repent

For some individuals, repentance is the convincing factor in an apology. Some mates will doubt the sincerity of an apology if it is not accompanied by their partner’s desire to modify their behavior to avoid 
the situation in the future.

It’s important to remember that all true repentance begins in the heart. A mate must feel poorly for hurting their loved one, and rely on God’s help in order to truly change. Admitting you are wrong creates vulnerability. It allows your mate to get a glimpse of your heart. The glimpse of true self is assurance that the apology was sincere.

One important aspect of genuinely repenting is verbalizing your desire to change. Your mate cannot read your mind. Though you may be trying to change inside, if you do not verbalize your desire to change to your mate, most likely they will still be hurt.

Many people have problems with repenting when they do not feel as though their actions were morally wrong. However, in a healthy relationship, we often make changes that have nothing to do with morality and everything to do with building a harmonious marriage.

It is also important to make a dedicated plan for change. Often apologies involving repentance fail because the person never set up steps of action to help ensure success. A person must first set goals for their change. After you create realistic goals, then you can start implementing a plan to change. Taking baby steps towards repentance instead of insisting on changing all at once will increase your chances of successfully changing your ways.

It is important to remember that change is hard. Constructive change does not mean we will immediately be successful. There will be highs and lows on the road to change. You must remember that with God’s help, anyone can change their ways if they are truly and genuinely ready to repent.

Request Forgiveness

In some relationships, a mate wants to hear their partner physically ask for forgiveness. They want assurance that their mate recognizes the need for forgiveness. By asking forgiveness for their actions, a partner is really asking their mate to still love them. Requesting forgiveness assures your mate that you want to see the relationship fully restored. It also proves to your mate that you are sincerely sorry for what you’ve done. It shows that you realize you’ve done something wrong. Requesting forgiveness also shows that you are willing to put the future of the relationship in the hands of the offended mate. You are leaving the final decision up to your partner – to forgive or not forgive.

Requesting forgiveness is not easy. It often leaves one vulnerable to the fear of rejection. Along with the fear of rejection is the fear of failing. Many people have a hard time seeking forgiveness because it means admitting that you have failed. The only way to overcome this fear is to recognize that it is very common amongst mankind. The commonality makes it okay to be a failure. It allows a stubborn mate to apologize to their partner and become a healthy individual.

Ultimately, it’s important to remember that there is a difference between asking for forgiveness and DEMANDING forgiveness. When we demand forgiveness, we tend to forget the nature of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a choice the offended party is supposed to make. Demanding forgiveness takes away the sincerity of asking for it.

Remember not to treat forgiveness lightly. It is something to be cherished and appreciated. The act of forgiveness is hard on both ends – for the person who’s asking and for the person who’s accepting.

**********************************************************

It was interesting to take this assessment to see where my apology language fell.  If you'd like to do the same, you can find the online assessment HERE.  I really would like to read the book and do some studying because there is one language that really concerns me and I wonder if it is even Biblical.  And though I think that requesting forgiveness is important, I feel that is something that is done through the Holy Spirit's prompting and if led, this step should be part of an apology not stated by itself.  That said, here were my results:

Apology Language Scores:

7	Expressing Regret
6	Accepting Responsibility
0	Making Restitution
5	Genuinely Repenting
2	Requesting Forgiveness

My top two apology languages is Expressing Regret. What you want to hear in an apology is an immediate expression of sorrow for causing you pain. A simple “I’m sorry” goes a long way.

My second most common apology language is Accepting Responsibility. What you are looking for in an apology is maturity. You most want to hear the offending party say, I was wrong and I take responsibility for my actions.

If you take this assessment, I'd really like to know your results!

Usually by this time of year, I would have viewed at least one of the videos put out by Advent Conspiracy.  This year I just happened upon one from a few years back and looked to see if there was one published for 2011.  I sorely needed to be reminded of what this video has to say today ...


Christmas has almost gotten to the point where I just want to skip it because it is so commercialized.  But as a believer, skipping it would completely be missing the point even as so many have pointed out, we don't know the exact date Jesus was born and most likely it wasn't December 25th.  Although I have a strong opinion about this topic, I do not feel that this blog is the place to point out what I believe to be other's faults.  So why do I bring it up?

As believers, we are called to give glory and praise to God in all that we do.  I'm human and American.  I too fight the urge to want to be surrounded by pretty things and to receive gifts as you saw from my Wish List a few weeks ago.  God spoke to my heart about the reasons behind my Wish List last night and the post has been removed.

During these last few days before Christmas, as we prepare to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior, please take the time to consider how you celebrate Him during this season.  Is what you are doing glorifying Him?  If not, what can you do differently?

Study of Psalm 46

After reading Monday's post, my friend Rene sent me the first link to a series she had recently listened to on Revive Our Hearts called A Mighty Fortress is Our God.  This series based on Psalm 46, sometimes referred to as Martin Luther's Psalm.  I'm including the links to the broadcasts as well as some of the highlights from the messages I have been able to listen to so far.

¹ God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
² Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
³ though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
⁴ There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells.
⁵ God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day.
⁶ Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall;
he lifts his voice, the earth melts.
⁷ The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
⁸ Come and see what the LORD has done,
the desolations he has brought on the earth.
⁹ He makes wars cease
to the ends of the earth.
He breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
he burns the shields with fire.
¹⁰ He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”
¹¹ The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.  

When Your World is in a Tailspin
J. Vernon McGee sums it up simply, saying, “This passage is about the sufficiency, the security, and the supremacy of God. He is the ultimate reality.”

Proverbs 18:10 says, “The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous man runs into it and is safe”.

He alone can give us stability, comfort, and peace in the midst of the crisis. Isaiah says it this way, “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you” (26:3). The secure life is not the one that has no problems. The secure life is the one that is grounded on God, founded on God, tethered to God.

It’s (Psalm 46) a song that’s intended to be sung, even though those singing it are in the midst of upheaval and deep troubles. The point is, when in trouble, sing! Sing! I love what Oswald Sanders says on that point. He says, “Faith can sing her song in the darkest hour, sorrow and singing are not incompatible.”

Are You in Trouble?
"God is our refuge, our strength, a very present help in trouble." He is what we need in trouble. We often think of all the other things we need or wish we had: a solution, relief, someone to sympathize with us. But this passage says, "No, turn to Him. He is our refuge."

God is our refuge. A refuge is a person or a place to which one flees for shelter or defense or protection. I think of those Old Testament cities of refuge, to which people in distress could flee to find safety and protection. Not only does God provide a place of refuge for us, but He Himself is our refuge, our safe place. He is the one who protects us, shelters us, and provides relief from danger and anxiety.

Psalm 2 puts it this way. “Blessed are all who take refuge in him” (v. 12). Some of your translations say, “Blessed are all who put their trust in him.” That is what you do with a refuge. You run to it and you put your trust in that place of refuge.

God is our refuge and our strength. He is a source of mental or emotional support when we need it—and that is all the time. We are weak and helpless, and we need His strength. He provides divine enabling in our weakness. He is the one who helps keep us strong. 

Charles Spurgeon had this to say about this phrase, "He is a very present help in trouble." He said, ...

He is more than "present." He is very present. More present than the nearest friends can be, for He is in us in our trouble; more present than we are to ourselves, for sometimes we lack presence of mind.

When You are Battered by Fear
Our hearts are attached to this earth until troubles come and shake us up. When they shake us up, our hearts get detached from this earth and more attached to God and heaven and eternal, unshakeable realities. That is part of the point of troubles. God knows that if we didn't have troubles, we would put our tent stakes down really deep here.

The antidote to fear in a terrifying world is not trying to arrange our lives from fear and trouble. The antidote to fear is anchoring our lives on the character of God. Now, when it says that we will not fear, that doesn't mean that we won't ever have fearful feelings. I think what it means is that we will not be overwhelmed or paralyzed by fear. We'll have the strength and the courage to overcome the fear.

The River of God
People are looking for something reliable, something unshakeable, something/someone they can count on, they can trust in. So often they think they have found it in a relationship or in a career or a source of income or a friend. The fact is most people today are placing their hope in what the hymn writer called “sinking sand.” Only God is unshakeable, and when the mountains crumble to the sea, and the sun refuses to shine, only He will always be there.

Psalm 36 says, “You give them drink from the river of Your delights. For with you is the fountain of life.”

In Psalm 65, “You visit the earth and water it; you greatly enrich it; the river of God is full of water.”

Jeremiah 17:7-8
Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is in the LORD. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.

Ezekiel 47: 9,12

God is in the Midst of His People
We will lose our minds if we don’t tether them to God’s Word.

Leviticus 26:11-12 says I will make my dwelling among you [God says]. And I will walk among you and will be your God, and you shall my people.  God is interested in relationship. God is interested in being near to His people. Proximity matters to God. He doesn’t want to be just some god out there that we hear about and we talk about, or we give mental assent to.

Sing and rejoice, O daughter of Zion, for behold, I come and I will dwell in your midst, declares the LORD. Zechariah 2:10

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

When Jesus returned to heaven, He promised He would send the Holy Spirit. John 14, Jesus said, “He dwells with you and he will be in you” (v. 17). Christ in you, the Holy Spirit in you, your hope of glory.

Then we have the New Heaven and the New Earth, the City of God in Revelation 21, “And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold the dwelling place of God is with man” (v. 3).

In his commentary on Psalm 46, John Calvin said,

If we desire to be protected by the hand of God, we must be concerned above all things that he may dwell amongst us; for all hope of safety depends upon his presence alone.

Scripture reminds us over and over again of the futility, the foolishness of looking to anyone or anything else for help. Psalm 60, “Oh, grant us help against the foe, for vain is the salvation of man! With God we shall do valiantly; it is he who will tread down our foes” (vv. 11-12).

Psalm 146, verse 3, “Put not your trust in princes, in the son of man, in whom there is no salvation.”

"Stand firm and see the salvation of the LORD, which He will work for you today. . . . The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to be silent." Exodus 14:13

God fulfills His promises. “At the break of day, God will come and help her.” (v. 5)
He may not come immediately; it may not seem that He is coming to our aid immediately, but He will come. Sometimes we have to go through the night first before we get to the break of day. The night may seem long, it may seem endless, but we need to remind ourselves, and remind each other, that dawn is ahead. With the dawn of the day will come His supernatural, right-on-time help.

“Weeping may endure for the night,” Psalm 30 says, “but joy comes,” when? “in the morning” (v. 5).

In every situation God is doing a thousand different things that we cannot see and we do not know. ~ John Piper

"The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." Lam. 3:22-23

Why Do the Nations Rage?
We just do things too fast today. We move too quickly, we read fast, and we kind of live on the surface of things.

Revelation 19 is one of my favorite passages in the whole Bible. Earlier in this passage we see Jesus coming from heaven on the white horse. It says,

I saw the beast and the kings of the earth with their armies gathered to make war against him who was sitting on the horse and against his army. And the beast was captured, and with him the false prophet. . . . These two were thrown alive into the lake of fire that burns with sulphur. The rest were slain by the sword that came from the mouth of him who was sitting on the horse, and all the birds were gorged with their flesh (vv. 19-21).

It kind of just reminds you that the outcome of the battle is not, at all, in question. The outcome is sure. So we see this cosmic battle, but then we see a microcosm of that battle in our own world. The anger of colleagues and family members against Christ that sometimes they take out on those who love and serve Him. They hate Him, and they take it out on you, and you feel caught in the cross fire, right? It can be intense. You may have experienced that in your marriage or in the work place. I’ve seen some of that myself in recent weeks. So how do we survive in the middle of that battle before the last chapter gets lived out? How do we keep from becoming terrified and cowering and running?

Things That Stop the Heart
Isaiah 34 says, “No weapon that is formed against you shall succeed.”

Desolations can turn you against God, can make you bitter. But once you see that desolations are part of God’s means of making wars to cease, then you can bless the Lord, and you can come to view even those desolations as a blessing.

Be Still!
Now, at first hearing, “Be still and know that I am God” sounds like it is encouraging us to lead a quiet, contemplative life. We think of it as a peaceful, calming, reassuring word of comfort for hassled, harried moments—and it is. But as I’ve been studying this passage, I’ve come to realize it is a lot more than that.

In this context, I believe that this phrase, “Be still and know that I am God,” is actually a command. It is a command to those who have been resisting God and threatening His people. Remember, this psalm was written on the occasion of some attempted attack on Jerusalem. God has been giving His people reasons to have courage and faith, to be free from fear, because God is their refuge. They can run to Him and be safe; He is their strength when they are weak and outnumbered by the enemy. He is their helper when they are helpless.

So He has been encouraging His people, but He also has a word now to speak to those who oppose Him, to the enemies. He says, “Be still! Know that I am God.” It is the equivalent of Hush! Stop fighting! Surrender! Drop your weapons. It is a word to the enemy. “Know that I am God.” That word know is “to recognize, to admit, to confess, to acknowledge” that “I am the God of the universe; you are not God. I am God. Stop arguing about it. Give in, surrender.” Do you see how you read it that way to these enemies, these forces of evil and adversity? Be still! Stop fighting!

God says, “I will be exalted.” The outcome is not in question. It is not a matter of let’s wait and see what the last chapter looks like. The last chapter has been written and we know who wins!

I read recently (I can’t remember where I read this) that it is more like a picture of God being the heavyweight champion of the world and fighting against some pathetic, quivering three-year-old. Satan is no match for God. God says, “I will be exalted.”

• Your problems are no match for God.
• Your husband is no match for God.
• Your prodigal teen is no match for God.
• You are no match for God.
• The complacency in your church is no match for God.
• The contention in your family is no match for God.
• The frustrations and evils in your workplace are no match for God.
• Your addicted friend who can’t seem to get free from sinful bondages is no match for God.

There is no bondage, no power, no force, no evil, no pressure, no problem that is any match for God.

In The Midst of the Storm
If I stand on my own, and as a leader, I’m especially tempted to withdraw in my life when there are troubles and trials, and my faith will falter. I’m not meant to be alone. So what I saw was a corporate declaration, “We will not fear.” I need my sisters. God made the body of Christ to come alongside each other. I need to borrow your faith when I am weak.  We need each other. We need to come alongside each other when we’re struggling, when we’re being bombarded and remind each other: “God is our refuge.” Not just mine; not just yours, but ours.

Join the Prayer Movement

Many years ago I was introduced to Operation World through friends.  I'm sure you've heard the saying that you.  In my case, this certainly was true.  As I began to pray for the people of other nations my focus and mindset began to change.  For one reason or another, I have gotten away from praying for other countries in a consistant manner and am committing myself to doing go again and am asking you to join me. 



I know many of you receive my blog posts via E-mail and aren't able to read them for 3-4 days after they are posted, so how about starting on September 1st?  Click this link to find out how to sign up to recieve daily E-mails on how to pray.

I do hope you'll join me, not only for 60 days, but for as long as God leads you.

Prayerfully Yours,

Today's Thought Provoking Thursday speaks for itself ...

For Many other free videos visit the website: www.sermonindex.net

Strong Enough

I hesitate to post you tube videos because they don't always stay centered. However, the reason behind many Christian songs are wonderful and cause us to think. For today's Thought Provoking Thursday, I'd like to share Matthew West's song Strong Enough.

Here's Matthew sharing the Story Behind the Song...

I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:13 NIV

and now, the song I have come to love...


Has God brought something into your life that you feel like you aren't strong enough to handle?  Can you trust Him enough to be strong enough?

Teasing - Is it All Just In Fun?

As a child therapist I work with kiddos who share a plethora of ways that they have been hurt by others.  One of these ways is teasing.  Upon doing a bit of research on this topic, here is what I have learned:

Teasers believe their comments are less hurtful than they really are; people who are teased misunderstand the intentions of the person doing the teasing.

Often, teasing is done in a spirit of affection and playfulness, and teasers attempt to convey these intentions through subtle nonverbal cues. However those who are being teased tend to miss these benign aims.

When teasers describe a time they someone, they tend to describe the action as more humorous and lighthearted than does the person being teased, who instead rates such incidents as more malicious and annoying. The good intentions of teasers are just not as obvious as teasers believe.

It's certainly true that some people are more able to use teasing -- i.e., making fun or mocking someone playfully -- in a nice way than are others. Some people can use teasing as a way to make people feel closer, as a way to show friendship -- which is obviously a good thing. But maybe that's more in the nature of "joshing" (teasing lite) than real "teasing." Some people are good at using teasing as a way to bring up a difficult subject in a way that's a relief to everyone -- very tricky to do well.

It can be very tempting -- and I've known many people who make a habit of this -- to say that you're "joking" or "teasing" and therefore a person is humorless and thin-skinned if he or she feels angry or hurt at something you've said.

The test of whether you're being funny if someone else finds you funny. The test of whether your teasing is friendly is whether the person being teased finds it friendly.

What do you think about teasing?

What's Your Personality - for Play???

As a play therapist, I often ask kids what modality they most like to tap into when we work together.  So when I read this article on Sunday, I thought I'd share for Thought Provoking Thursday.  I hope you'll take a minute (or five) to read it and let me know what you believe your play personality is.

For many adults, it's surprisingly hard to know how to have fun. Take a minute and think back...what did you like to do for fun when you were ten? Because that's probably something you'd enjoy now, whether walking in the woods, playing with your dog, making things with your hands, taking pictures, playing basketball, or dancing around the living room.

 

Because of my interest in play, I couldn't resist picking up Stuart Brown's Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul.  I was particularly struck by Brown's analysis of the question, "What is your play personality?" He makes clear that these categories aren't scientifically based, but a product of his years of observation.

Where do you fit in these eight personalities?

1. The Joker -- makes people laugh, plays practical jokes.
2. The Kinesthete -- loves to move, dance, swim, play sports.
3. The Explorer -- goes to new places, meets new people, seeks out new experiences (physically or mentally). *
4. The Competitor -- loves all forms of competition, has fun keeping score.
5. The Director -- enjoys planning and executing events and experiences, like throwing parties, organizing outings, and leading. *
6. The Collector -- loves the thrill of collecting, whether objects or experiences. *
7. The Artist/Creator -- finds joy in making things, fixing things, decorating, working with his or her hands. *
8. The Storyteller -- loves to use imagination to create and absorb stories, in novels, movies, plays, performances. *

What do you think? Does this accurately capture the different worlds of play?

 

Do you see yourself in this scheme? What do you do for play, and where does it fit in here?

** once again, eclectic is my name and more than one category is my game!

Intentional Thanksgiving

For several years I have followed Ann Voskamp's blog A Holy Experience.  So when I found out that she had written One Thousand Gifts, I requested it from the library.  Several weeks ago it was finally my turn to check it out.  In the two weeks this book was in my possession, I was only able to get a bit more than halfway through it.  Today I share a bit from Chapter 3.

"A nail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit."
~ Erasmus

I, too, had read it often, the oft-quoted verse: "And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ" (Ephesians 5:20).  And I, too, would not and say straight-faced, "I'm thankful for everything."  But in this counting gifts, to one thousand, more, I discover that slapping a sloppy brush of thanksgiving over everything in my life leaves me deeply thankful for very few things in my life.  A lifetime of sermons on "thanks in all things" and the shelves sagging with books on these things and I testify: life-changing gratitude does not fasten to a life unless nailed though with one very specific nail at a time. ~ Ann Voskamp in One Thousand Gifts

What steps are you taking to "give thanks in everything"?  I am definitely pondering that question on this Thought Provoking Thursday and hope you will too.

To Share or Not To Share, That is the Question

Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway.~ Eleanor Rosevelt

If you've been following my blog for any amount of time, you may have noticed that I have a little somethin' somethin' for quotes.  Words are my passion.  Thankfully as a therapist, I'm becoming more of a listener than a talker! 

Listening to the kids in my group the last month or so has motivated me to find some positive encouragement in the form of quotes to share with the 5-12 year olds.  I came upon the quote (above) by Eleanor Rosevelt this week and pondered, is this the kind of quote I should share with my clients?

What are your thoughts?  I'd love to hear!